I Am The Walking Dead: Growing Up With The Zombie Series

by Steven Harris

DISCLAIMER: This post will have spoilers for not just The Walking Dead #193, but for the entire series.  A more thoughtful analysis of the series and the finale is to come at a later date. 

To say I was there at the beginning may be a lie. I cannot pinpoint the exact moment I boarded the fandom train that was The Walking Dead. While the book started in October 2003, my memory of picking up issue #1 was around the same time that Green Lantern: Rebirth (the start of an equally influential and personal run to me) came out — however that book would not be released until October 2004, a full year later. What may be a more accurate statement is that The Walking Dead was there at my beginning. 

It should not surprise anyone that growing up I was more of what is referred to as an “inside kid”. Despite playing on sports teams, a lot of my adolescent summers were spent playing video games and reading and rereading (and rereading and reading) comic books. Now as an adult, I cannot tell you how many times I have read The Walking Dead. However, what I can do is tell you what was happening in the book at each pivotal moment in my life:

January 2006 – Writer Robert Kirkman published a blog post for CBR for his “Buy My Books” Colum where he attempts to tell people to not waste their time by trying to break into the comic book industry. (Link) Kirkman’s words cut my teenage self to his core and sets me on the path of becoming an attorney. This comes on the eve of The Walking Dead #25 being published.

August 2006 – As I transitioned into high school, Rick Grimes and company started to encounter Woodberry residents for the first time. 

Late 2007 / Early 2008 – With every paycheck from my first job as a cashier, I made sure enough money was put back to ensure that I could purchase each new issue of the NO ONE IS SAFE arc. 

May 2010 – I graduated from high school and The Walking Dead hits issue 72. As I started to about going out into the wider world, Rick Grimes and company started to branch out into Alexandria community. 

July 3, 2010 – I am able to meet Robert Kirkman one last time before I moved away to college and the Walking Dead becomes a world wide phenomena.

December 2011 – I walked up to Robert Kirkman at a signing at A+ Comics & Collectibles in my hometown of Lexington, Kentucky with the freshly released issue 92 in my hands. I joke and tell him that I am going to law school because of what he wrote five years ago on his blog. He awkwardly laughed it off. We ran into each other again later that evening at a screening of David Fincher’s The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. He apologized to me again.

July 2012 – I moved in with my girlfriend. As we shared an apartment and discussed what our relationship would look like moving forward, Glenn had  his head bashed in by a baseball bat. 

August 2014 – The Whispers emerged as the new antagonists in the book as I started law school.  

April 2017 – As I marry my wife, Rick Grimes learned that his wife was doomed in issue 166.

July 2017 – When Carl started his new role in the Hilltop community, I was studying to take the BAR exam.

July 2019 – As I start to drown in work and feel that I am not in control of my life, one of the few constants in my life is suddenly gone — The Walking Dead is over. 

As a fan who has grown with the characters in the book, it is hard not to feel slightly betrayed. It still has not sunk in that I am never going to see any of these characters again. For the past sixteen years, this book has been there every month in my holds folder…and now it won’t be. From an artistic standpoint, Robert Kirkman deserves a standing ovation for ending the book in this manner. It’s a perfect analogy of how characters died in the book — it was often sudden, upsetting, and unpredictable.  I am incredibly grateful for the endings we do get in the final issue. As I sat on my porch and read the final issue, tears welled up in eyes seeing how far some of the characters have come from their introduction. Listening to the rain, I cried full tears at seeing how far Michonne had come during the course of the series. She is a character who was literally thrown into the depths of hell, and seeing her come through the other side is so damn empowering. 

Endings are always hard. They never full satisfy the entire fanbase, and some fans will renounce the entire series due to their hatred of the ending. Personally, I am not a fan of the way Kirkman summarizes the last sixteen years of storytelling down into a simple children’s story. It is a trope that is over-used and allows authors to glance over years over storytelling for simplicity’s sake (I’m looking at you Sweet Tooth).  Reducing the growth the characters had over decades down into single panels (and in the case of Negan — off screen) is bothersome. For a series that has taken its sweet time by dragging out storylines, the abrupt nature of the ending of beloved characters is startling and almost feels like a disservice. However, I realize I only feel that way because I have seen these characters grow at a rate of 22 pages a month for the past sixteen years — my mind has still not adjusted to the fact that they’re officially gone forever now. When you step back and look at the series as a whole,  Kirkman’s unexpected finale ends on a high note. There was never any doubt that this book was Rick Grimes’s story, so it only makes since that the book ends with his death. Kirkman could’ve pulled a David Chase Soprano’s ending and immediately cut to black the moment of Rick’s death. The finale is a gift in a lot of ways — we are not entitled to any sort of closure for non-Rick Grimes characters; this is Kirkman’s story after all and he owes nothing to fans. The finale hammers in what a heroic character Rick Grimes is and why he should be on par with an Odyessus or Vladek Spieglman. The sacrifices that Rick made in his lifetime for the greater good are inspiring. Furthermore, with the finale that Kirman does give us, he shows that people can overcome the difficulties of their lives — that they don’t have to be defined by their tragedies.   

Without The Walking Dead being published on a monthly basis, the comic book industry has a titanic void to file. Without The Walking Dead being published on a monthly basis, I have a titanic void to fill. All great literature impacts the reader on some level, and I can say without a doubt The Walking Dead has affected my world view. I doubt we will see a book on this caliber again, and I am truly grateful that I was able to experience the story in real time.